Hello there!

These are the tales of a single-again, 20-something-year-old, "sassy chef". I am on the road to self-(RE)discovery after the devastation of my divorce. I want to know who I am, what I want out of life, and how to get it. Things may be hard right now, but the show must go on, so I have decided to blog about every second of it. Who needs a therapist anyways, when I have you guys?!? :)

So, here I am...

Let me start off by saying...I feel that a LOT of people truly misunderstand me, but those that get me REALLY get me...

I am easy to confide in, trustworthy, and can keep a secret for ages! Once you win me over you have a friend for a lifetime...it's just winning me over that's the struggle, for I am not easily impressed...



WHICH BRINGS ME TO MY NEXT POINT...



I struggle with being too up front with people. I usually don't know when to keep my opinons to myself until it's too late. This is something I have had to mindfully and continuously work on throughout my life and it is still a work in progress.

I can be extremely indecisive in just about every aspect that one's life can cover, swinging back and forth quite frequently, but once I have made up my mind, that's it! It is made up!



I am quite OCD about certain quirky things, such as hanging all of my clothes in a color coordinated fashion, turning the volume on the radio only to increments of 5, and cursing those that don't shut the shower curtain, among other weird things that I don't know how to get over.



I have a witty, or just plain sarcastic, sense of humor that a lot of people don't get unless they know me...my life is like one big inside joke and you may never know why I am laughing. Or why I say the things I say. But I have my reasons. Trust me, I'm not crazy :)



I have a BIG heart and am very compassionate toward others. If only a girl could have the time and financial freedom to live off volunteer work alone!



I LOVE to cook and if you ask me, that is about the only true talent or creativity I posess, though my mom would say differently because all moms are supposed to.



I am obsessed with sour gummy worms and popcorn flavored jelly beans, but am not really big into too many other sweets.



The sounds of a ferocious thunderstorm lull me into the best nights of sleep and I am an early riser by choice and by circumstance, but definitely not by nature.



Lastly, but not least... I serve an AWESOME God and I desire to be close to Him more than anything else in this world!!! He is my EVERYTHING!

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Destruction or dinner?!?

So...there is supposedly a MASSIVE tornado headed straight for me. Nice! Not exactly the type of entertainment I had in mind for a Wednesday night, but "it'll do donkey"...

I can't even let my dog out to pee because it's storming so bad! But she's been holding it all day... So, what's a few more hours? Lol!

At this very moment we are in the downstairs bathroom with plenty of pillows and candles just in case the power goes out. The lights have been flickering every now and again, but the storm has yet to prevail! (*knocking on wood*)

If my house is destroyed I will be pretty upset! I haven't eaten dinner yet and I am starving, so if my stove and refrigerator are no longer standing when I come out of this bathroom, I'm going to be upset with somebody! LOL!

"Taking cover" is so lame when you're alone! Good thing I brought some books down with me. It may be a little while....

Friday, April 15, 2011

Dear 5:00 AM, Why must you taunt me?!?

I am laying here like a lame, old woman (no offense to those of you who really ARE old- *cough, cough*) thinking about how I am already dreading going to work at the nursing home tomorrow...

For starters, I just HATE having to get up that early!

I absolutely LOVE the residents and I love feeling like I can better what could be the last days of an elderly person's life! I just don't care much for the lack of communication in the workplace, the attitudes that we deal with from co-workers and mostly from the family members of the residents, along with miscellaneous other things that totally get on my nerves.

I guess I just have to keep my perspective on WHY I am there.
But I'm not going to lie, sometimes that is

Just.

Plain.

Hard.

The whole meaning of the job is quite rewarding and I have certain people that I look forward to spending time with, my favorite being Mrs. "M" who I bring Louis L'Amour books for. She is such a joy to be around and I always take away more from her than I could ever give in return. She has taught me many things about life in the short time I have known her. I could sit with her for hours, enthralled in what she has to say.
She is 90 years old and has her wits about her. She has a better memory than I do, on my good days. A frail, sharp-featured woman, she is often misunderstood and no one else really cares for her besides me and 2 other people, possibly in the world. Sometimes I wonder if her own family cares for her much because of her strong personality and her opinions that she is more than happy to share. She and I are of kindred spirits for sure! Lol! I love this lady dearly and she makes me miss my nanny! :(
Maybe one day I can be that kind of influence upon someone else's life! One can only hope...

This is ridiculous...

Okay, so can SOMEBODY please tell me what's going on with this stupid weather? I want some answers...NOW!

I was minding my own business, getting used to the beautiful, sunny, 70's we were enjoying then all of a sudden,

BAM

The next thing I know, we are having severe thunderstorms, flash flood warnings, tornado warnings...Several schools had to let out at 1pm today. I even left work 3 hours early for fear of the weather being dangerous. It sure was yucky outside, but seriously Alabama? What a joke! For those of you who don't live here, you should see when there is even the slightest hint of snow. It's like the whole world is coming to an end and EVERYTHING shuts down! Lol!
I missed out on dying Easter eggs Easter eggs
and eating homemade pizza for some thunder and lightning and a few drops of rain? You have got to be kidding me!
Curse you lame weather!
Btw, How am I supposed to work on a tan like THIS?
This is soooo not my kind of Spring!

Bittersweet..

Today was a bittersweet day. On my way to class I stopped and checked the mail. My official divorce decree was awaiting my arrival.
As weird as it seems to say it, I am now a "single" woman.
This has both its perks and its downsides.
One of the perks being that I don't have to cook dinner if I don't feel like it :)...but one of the downsides being I don't have someone to hold me tight when I need it the most. There is just something about marriage that you can't possibly understand unless you've been there. No matter the good, the bad, and the ugly, it was still a marriage.

A unity.

A companionship.

And until you've been there and done that you will think I am crazy for holding onto any part of it.

On a much lighter note, I have decided on a name for my rabbit (I think).
What better of a name to coincide with my dog Ginger than the name of yet another thing I cook with? I think it's precious and the two go well together. So, I think it's official, "SAGE" it is...

Thursday, April 14, 2011

Today is a good day...

If you include what I am writing about this second, I have thought about my ex a total of about 3 times today, therefore; today is a good day.
When all of this first started to transpire it was impossible not to think of him every second of every day! I wanted to call him allll the time. He was what was so familiar to me for 6 years.
It's hard to break routines, but I feel I am well on my way.

My best friend is coming over tonight. She and I are going to have a nice, heatlhy dinner, and hopefully some fun girl talk. My house has gone from being a "nest egg" to a sorority of sisters. My dog is female, my rabbit is female, and anyone who enters this house is also female, and I like it just like that!

I had a "Tastefully Simple" party last Saturday (with only women, of course) and it was wonderful! I love to have special get-togethers and will find any excuse to do so!

As I sit here writing this I seem to hear some sort of sizzling and smell a slight hint of smoke...for those of you wondering, this is not a good sign...

be right back....

Okay, it's official, the house is still in good standing. :)

My chicken started to sizzle and my cheese sauce was sticking and slightly burned on the bottom, but all is well and we are enjoying our yummy pasta!

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Normal again?

Sometimes I swear I am the only person who feels this way.

It doesn't really matter HOW I feel.

I just know that I am alone.

But then I stop and realize there are millions of other women who have conquered the world of divorce while grabbing life by the throat and taking what they want out of it.

I want to be one of THOSE women!

Sadly, I am not quite there. I am just the same old "Tiffy" who is trying my hardest to trust in God with each step I take, carefully avoiding the land mines that all too frequently I find myself encompassed with. I whole-heartedly believe that I too will get there, someday. My dad said I would simply have to find a new "normal", which makes perfect sense to me. 
When I asked when I would feel normal again, "Katz" told me to call her next Spring because she swears I will be "awesome"! I may not see that in the here and now, but something inside of me knows that she is correct.


So, for the time being I will hold onto that, while marking down the days on my calendar...